Refocus: Out of the Shadows
Citizen photographer Gill Ashington reflects on her journey from diagnosis to dream exhibition
image credit: Gill AshingtonGill first received a diagnosis of Frontotemporal Dementia (FTD) via a video call during a COVID-19 lockdown, aged 48.
As her age meant she didn’t meet the criteria for the few groups on offer at the time, and with the pandemic ongoing, Gill was totally isolated until she began a series of Bright Shadow funded one-to-one sessions with photographer Jen Holland.
In collaboration with a team of Bright Shadow artists, Gill went on to achieve her goal of presenting her own exhibition entitled Refocus: Out of the Shadows at The Beaney, Canterbury in 2023.
Community through photography
“Before Covid I used to work in mental health, but when I was diagnosed during lockdown they cancelled my contract and retired me out. I had started taking photographs when I was out walking my dogs, just as a nice thing to do, something I enjoyed. I was taking pictures of things like different plants and trees or sunrises on the beach and sending them to friends and family on WhatsApp.
“Having met Clare Thomas through my involvement with an NHS advocacy group, Bright Shadow arranged for me to have 1-1 photography sessions with professional photographer Jen Holland. and as well as meeting up in different places to take photographs, she also helped me to look for different types of lenses and at different types of things I could do on my phone camera setting to make it easier for me.
Pipe dream to reality
“The exhibition was a bit of a pipe dream really, but Bright Shadow was very supportive and made it happen. The big thing was about it being recognised that you could still do things. It was an opportunity to get out and enjoy something you enjoy doing, learn about how you can do it better and how to adapt if you need to, as well as a chance to raise awareness about younger people with dementia. The fact that Jen is an actual photographer was quite important, because it gives the whole thing more value.
“I also did some work with writer Liz Jennings around words, including the title and descriptions for the chosen images displayed in the exhibition, discussing what each one represented and how it came about. Then we went over it at Liz’ house and filmmaker Al Reffell recorded us having a chat about all the photographs for a film to play at the exhibition. Al went away and edited it along with a number of videos I’d taken down at Walmer beach of sunrise, but also of stormy content. I did not want to ‘candy floss’ dementia.
“Everyone I discussed the exhibition with, really listened and took on what I said and tried to make sure I was included and what was important to me.
Being part of the world
“There’s very little awareness or knowledge around dementia – there’s a lot of unknowns. People think that dementia’s all about memory problems and it’s not. People are discredited as not having value or anything to offer anymore.
“Once you have a diagnosis, it feels like you are told to go away and talk about all the things you can’t do, or that there’s no treatment. When actually the treatment is about doing things that you enjoy and meeting up with people and being part of the world. Not sitting in the corner with felt tip pens.
“There are very limited opportunities and there’s very limited access, but Bright Shadow caters for everyone. I now attend their Zest sessions in Deal, which is brilliant because I can take my support dog and there’s a really friendly atmosphere, with lots of different ages. Sometimes I think people can get a bit lost within a group, but at their sessions, everybody is involved whatever your ability is and everybody’s contribution is important.”